As
I watch this terrible television show, that follows the lives and whereabouts of your favorite celebrities, I notice that the differences between the ways the host speaks
about the stories dealing with women vs. men. They are extremely sexist and
disrespectful. Here it is, another day of women being bashed for living their
lives freely, and minding their own businesses. So, The story goes a woman was
dating this rapper and had a child by him and eventually he left her. They host
says maybe you shouldn’t be with a man because he is rich aka “Stop gold-digging”.
Why
do men treat woman so badly? What is it about the woman that has all of these “Men”
treating us like all we have to offer the world is parts of our bodies that
pleases them? What is it about her that causes men to think its okay to
disrespect and degrade us, while we live to lift them up? It must be the power!
Women have been succeeding amongst our male counterparts at equal to greater
rates in the status quo than ever before (I guess that’s what happens when you
decide to finally give woman the rights they deserve). Women are running more
and more businesses and the film industry is being taken by storm with women
leaders as well. If you believe that is too much of a reach, then let me break
it down for you. Women are not taking the back seat to anything anymore and
that my friend is causing problems, maybe its their egos being slaughtered, or their
paychecks being the same, maybe just maybe she is better equipped in every
aspect of life and most simple minded men just cannot take it anymore.
Well,
if you cannot take the heat, maybe you should get out of the Kitchen!
One
of my guy friends told me he met a girl a few weeks ago at some type of hipster
coffee shop. They started talking (not dating) and things were going great –
but as time passed she became too attached. Out of curiosity, I asked him why
he felt the way he did. He said, “She was falling in love” similar to what he
experienced with a different woman he was involved with. His actions showed he really liked this
new woman in his life. He was taking her out on dates almost every other day.
He spent the majority of his time with her. For him to say she was getting
attached was a bit odd to me. His actions didn’t line up with his feelings. He
only wanted to sleep with her nothing more. Once he achieved his goal, he
stayed around for a bit but eventually without a word or a hint of a goodbye he
left altogether. He blocked her phone number, email and all of her social
media.
As
soon as he knew she couldn’t contact him, he moved on and decided it would be a
great idea to let his friends know about it. A few of them laughed but of
course everyone braced himself or herself for my opinion because I’m not one to
sit around and let someone treat others wrong. I told him the obvious; he
should have handled the situation totally different. This wasn’t cool and I wanted
to know why he didn’t tell her his intentions. He actually thought discussing
his intentions with her would be too serious of a conversation to have.
If
you think it’s okay to have sex within the first few nights it should be
appropriate to ask about someone’s intentions. Sex is more serious than a
simple conversation. As adults, we can choose to have sex whenever we want. I
didn’t fault him for wanting to have sex with her, he is human. However I did have
an issue with the way he went about it. He openly discussed his sexual life with his group of friends and laughed about how he used a woman for sex. I couldn’t
support a friend who treated a woman like a she was nothing but a mere toy. He had zero regard for feelings or emotions, nor did he think that we, his group of friends would have a problem with what he was saying. Not only did he disrespect the people who raised her, he
disrespected her by pursuing her sexually with the false hopes of a
relationship. No one should be treated the way he treated her.
Now some of people would say she
disrespected herself. Times have definitely changed. We live in an age where
men are respected for their misdeeds while women are looked down upon for their actions. My friend
tried to remove the title of a Queen by reaching for her vagina and not her
crown. He thought that he dominion over her because he is good looking, has a
penis, and a degree. In the end he really played his own self. He simply
believed telling women they are beautiful would open their hearts, minds and
eventually their legs.
Just imagine you believe everything to
be going well and the next day the person you spent your time, energy, and body
with doesn’t answer your phone calls, texts or even social media messages.
Every means of communications is gone but the memories from the night before are
in the back of your mind. How would that make a person feel? Unimportant and
misused, I am guessing. When my friend decided to stop acting like a jerk and
reached out to her she in return blocked him from everything. It was well
deserved if you ask me! I haven't heard much about the situation since it
happened but its time men realize they don't have the power that they
think they do!
It is funny because I once thought that
the power of a woman resided in her man/husband. Now I realize power resides in
her, and everything she does is a direct reflection of her respect for the
person she allowed to lead the relationship. A woman will support her man or
husband through every accomplishment and shortcoming, and will not question
taking the back seat to see her mate win. Now, in the same respect when a man
doesn’t realize that he is winning because of her, she can take that power he
thinks he has and let it crash around him. That usually happens in the early
boyfriend stages. Something about the term boyfriend doesn't
really account for anything to me. Too many relationships are temporary. Temporary
situations, temporary love, lust and temporary care for one another. TOO MANY
MEN (using Men loosely) THINK OBTAINING SEX FROM A WOMAN IS A THE ULTIMATE
GOAL. There isn’t enough support, prayer, encouragement, friendship, respect,
humility, truth, guidance, faith and discretion. Power comes from within. Woman are powerful beyond
measure, we control this universe.
In conclusion, women deserve
to be treated like queens. Why do men find it a necessary act of rights to
dehumanize women in any way? To my women out there, we have to stop believing
in this false sense of love that we see at the movies. Why? Because many of us,
while in search of that hopeless romantic sap story, will get stuck with
someone who doesn’t do half of what we see and always dream of him being more
than what he is. Stop falling for everyone’s potential. In the beginning, they
will go out of their way to show you who they COULD be but its not always how
they WILL be. We can imagine a high level of greatness for someone and begin
losing sleep to make sure they reach it, but we never stop and think to
ourselves, sometimes, people just never live up to their potential.
-Reeyana Sehgeh
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